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Dating Advice For Women

December 19, 2013

Dating Tips for Introverts


Dating can be tough sometimes. It can also be a lot of work. Extroverts seem to have a easier time with dating, but us introverts may actually dread socializing with new people. It’s hard being an introvert in the dating world sometimes. How do you talk to a person when you always find yourself tongue-tied or shy in social settings? If you are looking to blossom into a more social being, there are a number of things you can do.

Get Out of Your Head

First things first: some people are just born introverts and will continue to be shy their entire lives. However, there definitely a level of shyness that you can control. Stop second guessing yourself and try to build some confidence. Remind yourself about how great you are and how lucky someone would be to be with you. One characteristic of many shy people is that they focus on what others are thinking about them. It’s time to stop doing that. Just do you and go show everyone what you’re made of.

Get Out of Your Comfort Zone

Go out and force yourself to be in more social settings with friends. Odds are your friends are well-aware of your introvert qualities and will help to gently push you to be a little more social. Let them! If you’re out and they see a cutie across the bar for you, bat an eyelash or gaze over to show interest. If said cutie seems interested, wait for them to cover over to you and then try your best to make some good conversation, even if it’s just for a few minutes. Not every conversation with someone new will turn into something, but think of it as practice.

Still Take It Slow

Don’t go out and immediately spit game to everyone you see because that’s an unrealistic step for you. Introverts should take baby steps and ease their way into being more social beings. You’ve probably been an introvert for your whole life, so taking it slow will help you. Stay in your comfort zone until you think you’re ready to branch out a little bit more.  Engage your circle of friends in places you frequent a lot and then try somewhere new to mix it up.

Stick to What You Know

Sure, opposites attract, but in this case it may be best to stick with what you know. It’s easier for shy people to talk to people who are like-minded or who are interested in the same things. If you’re into comic books or movies or whatever, look for people to talk to in those kinds of settings. Again, consider each new situation as practice and soon you’ll be able to gauge whether you want someone just like you or someone a little bit different.

The Right Person Will Come Along and the Shyness Will Go Out the Window

I always used to consider myself shy and awkward around new guys. When I met my current boyfriend, somehow all of that went out of the window. From the second I met him, I immediately felt comfortable around him and didn’t feel anxious or awkward at all. Out of nowhere, I became this extrovert who felt completely at ease in a conversation with someone new. I bet that moment will happen for all introverts at some point. You might have to live through a lot of awkward situations and bad dating stories to get there, but someone awesome is waiting for you on the other side.

Introverts have the same basic similarities, but every one of them is different. Each introvert will approach dating in their own way, so these tips are meant as a basic guideline. Feel free to adapt them to suit your personality and lifestyle. Happy dating!


About the Author

Elisa Freese
Elisa Freese is a lifelong New Yorker with a Bachelor’s degree from SUNY New Paltz and a Master’s degree from New York University. She has always had a love for writing and now that school and homework are finally done forever, Elisa is going back to writing on a regular basis. In addition to writing, Elisa loves anything that has to do with traveling, shopping, social media and TV/movies. With her experiences, as well as the experiences of her friends and family, Elisa hopes to shed some light on the ins and outs of dating to the readers of Nouveau Dating.

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