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Dating Tips & Relationship Advice

Dating Advice For Women

May 22, 2013

I Caught Him Cheating!


Dear Most Brave Girl,

I was out last night and I saw one my best friend’s boyfriends making out with another girl. Do I tell her?


Scared Silent

Dear SS,

Yes, tell her. Oh man it’s going to be the worst. But yes. Here’s why:

The Golden Rule

If your best friend knew that your boyfriend was cheating on you, wouldn’t you want her to tell you? Friends are supposed to protect each other. If you don’t tell her, you’re not protecting her, you’re protecting her mean, two-timing boyfriend. Why would you do that? You owe no loyalty to him. She deserves a nice, one-timing boyfriend.

But It’s None of My Business and I REALLY DON’T WANT TO

It’s your best friend. Her business is your business. What if she finds out some other way and then discovers that you knew all along? Or what if she’s publicly humiliated somehow (like, it’s ALL over twitter) and you could have prevented it? Don’t worry about being the murdered messenger. It’s better that it comes from you than anyone else. It’s a bad situation no matter what you do, but either she’ll be devastated for a while and then get over it (with help from a nice friend like you who has her best interests at heart) or she’ll stay in a deceitful relationship with a lowlife boyfriend. Do you want to sit on this information for the duration of their coupledom while you know the scummy truth?

Brace Yourself

She might have a really bad reaction right away. Remember that she’s feeling embarrassed and rejected, so she might say things in the moment that she doesn’t mean and lash out at you. But hopefully when she’s had a little time to process, she’ll appreciate your honesty. Anyone would be lucky to have a best friend who was watching out like you are.

If they stay together, you’ve said your piece and hopefully she understands why you did. She might forgive him in the end but she definitely deserves to know. Forgive him or not, you need to give her the chance to make the choice herself. By keeping that secret, you’re making the choice for her.

The consequences of zipping your lips are so much worse (and more likely to explode in your face) than the risks of spilling your secret. If she’s resentful towards you, she was never a very good friend.

Too Confusing Need Robot Answer Now Plz

If it was me, I would want my friend to tell me even if it would break my heart. I’d rather get my heart broken by a friend who loves me than find out later and get it broken by some jerk who doesn’t.

Do you have a question about dating, love or the single life? Leave it in the comments and I’ll reply in next week’s Question & Answer!

About the Author

Most Brave Girl
MostBraveGirl is the Executive Editor for Nouveau Dating and Love is Everywhere. She is a search and destroy robot for anyone acting stupid while trying to get laid. Ask for her help if you are one of those people.

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