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Dating Advice For Women

February 20, 2014

When He Says He’ll Call But Then He Doesn’t

sad woman looks at her cell phone while her friend comforts her

We’ve all experienced the joy and excitement that comes with meeting a new guy that you totally hit it off with. The moment where you’re both into each other is exhilarating. So when he tells you he’ll call, of course you’re thrilled and look forward to hearing from him. For the next few days, every time your phone buzzes your stomach does a little flip because you think it might be him. And then, when a few days go by and you haven’t heard anything, you start to wonder what could be wrong. It’s been three days and he hasn’t called yet. He hasn’t even sent you a quick text simply to say hi. What could you have done wrong? After all, he was into you the last time you talked to him, right? You try not to let it get to you, but with each passing day with no contact, you get angry and start feeling awful about yourself. He totally left you in the dark.

So why hasn’t he called? Will he ever get to it or should you move on? What would he think if you called him? There can be many explanations about why he hasn’t called you, but here are three possible reasons.

He’s Not That Into You

It’s possibly that he didn’t call because he’s simply not into you. Maybe when you met at the bar or at that party he was really drunk and now realizes he didn’t mean to show that much interest. He could also have been simply trying to get a quick hook up and now that the moment has passed, he doesn’t want to pursue it anymore. Regardless of why he isn’t into you, you need to realize that it’s not your fault. Whatever it is, his reason doesn’t matter. Be confident in who you are and realize that you don’t need a guy like this in your life. You’ll meet a guy who does call you and when you do, you’ll be glad you didn’t waste too much time dwelling on why this guy didn’t.

He’s Busy

Maybe his schedule filled up quickly or something else suddenly came up in his work, school or personal life that made him forget about everything else, including you. This doesn’t mean that he’s not into you, but it also doesn’t mean that he is. If he ends up getting in touch with you and delivers this excuse, let it slide this time, but if he keeps acting flaky, you should probably let go for good.

He’s Clueless

While some guys know what’s up,  this guy might not realize that he needs to keep up the communication. You  might need to give him a little bit of a push. If it’s been a while since you guys have talked, send him a quick, casual text. If he doesn’t get back to you, you know he’s not as interested. If he does, give him a break. Some guys don’t realize that women need a little more communication than they do to be comfortable with how the relationship is progressing.

Ultimately you have to make a decision when he doesn’t call. Are you going to be brave and make a move, or try to wait it out? If you choose to make a move, be confident. If he’s still not into it, it’s not your problem. You put yourself out there and you’re a better, stronger person for doing so. If you choose to wait it out, you might never hear from him and you need to be able to make you peace with that and move on.

Whatever happens, it’s not too big of a deal. There will be lots of other boys. So stop waiting by the phone and go find them!





About the Author

Elizabeth Monsoor
Elizabeth Monsoor is currently working on her Bachelor of Fine Arts in dance at Cornish College of the Arts in Seattle, Washington. While Elizabeth pursues a career in dance, she has rediscovered her love for writing. When she is not in class or at rehearsals, Elizabeth enjoys actively commenting on episodes of reality television and tweeting her observations on relationships several times a day. She has an “eyes wide open” approach to dating, acting as an unofficial advisor and commentator on her friends’ relationships. Elizabeth hopes that her opinions on relationships and her love of sarcasm both entertain and inspire her readers.




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