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January 17, 2013

Committing

frighten couple bound with ropes

No it’s not a title for a new horror movie, even though a lot of people fear this word. You might’ve met the right person and they want something concrete, but you’ve got this thing about committing, and they’ve given you an ultimatum. Now, you’re struggling with overcoming this fear because this person is important to you, but you’re not sure if going out of your comfort-zone is worth it.

Here are five reasons why you should take that leap of faith and commit.

1.       Experience Is Vital.

 

As children, we tried to walk and fell. Without falling, we’d never have learned how to stand, let alone walk. As daters, we strive for a union, and it isn’t always a pleasant experience. At times, we feel uncomfortable and insecure in the relationship. We fear serious involvement because it means compromising our independence. But it’s the knowledge gained from each relationship – learning how to make reasonable accommodations – that is invaluable to that future ideal match. By avoiding commitment, you’re stunting your potential for growth.

 

2.       If It Doesn’t Kill You…

 

It makes you stronger. A common worry of committing is having your heart broken. Say you were afraid of being caught in a natural disaster, like an earthquake, and you live in an area where earthquakes are frequent. Would you avoid going out entirely? Would you take every measure to ensure that you never have to be caught in the quake? Of course not, that’s no way to live. Structuring your whole life around the intention that you’ll never commit is going to make you more unhappy than a breakup would. You will survive each heart ache so there’s no need to hide. Each failed relationship will empower you and prepare you for the next.

 

3.       Give And Take.

 

Dating is about getting to know that other person. Relationships are about finding the right balance of personalities and working through the clashes. Commitment is focused around finding what the other person needs, what you need, and how you can provide that for each other.

 

4.       Stop Examining.

 

Analyzing your fear can eventually become overanalyzing. Weighing the pros and cons of committing becomes obsessive and unhelpful. It starts to be more of an excuse than reasoning.

 

5.       Fight For Love.

 

Love is beautiful and enlightening, and also a privilege. Internalize the desire to love; otherwise it’ll pass you by.

Hopefully, if these reasons don’t get you going, then you’ll find that person that will. Once you open yourself up to relationships and stop being closed off emotionally, you will surprise yourself. Be optimistic about commitment, and your world can be colorfully ten shades brighter, rather than a dull gray.





About the Author

Samantha Daniel
Samantha Daniel is a Colorado native, attending Metro State University majoring in technical communication, with emphases in writing and editing. Her passion for relationships, dating, and romance unfolds in her articles.




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