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January 21, 2014

Why It’s Okay to Take it Slow

Rear view full section of couple holding eachother

When you meet someone who you really enjoy being with, the rush of feelings can be hard to ignore, especially if it’s your first breath of fresh romantic air in a very long time while. When you finally find a new flame, it can feel almost impossible to be patient enough to let things play out naturally. Often you’ll want to rush things and skip to the part where you guys become a couple, complete with romantic security. While you want to encourage the relationship’s evolution, it can be harmful to push anything in the relationship too hard or too fast. It can also speed you too quickly through the fun discovery stages of an early relationship.

Don’t Be Too Pushy

There’s a difference between putting a healthy amount of effort into a relationship and being so eager that you scare your new sweetheart away. You never want to be the person who sends too many texts. There’s nothing wrong with an equally balanced texting relationship, but that is what it should be: equal. If you notice that they’re getting a little annoyed, take a step back. It might have nothing to do with you, but if you keep pushing, you may end up irritating enough that your new love interest tells you to back off.

Also, in the age of social media, it’s very easy to “accidentally” know a lot more about someone than they have revealed. Even though you know certain details about this person, don’t let on. It’s always best to leave these details out of conversation until they tell you personally. When they want you to know something, it will come out organically.

The More You Know

Even though you should avoid social media stalking, it’s important to know as much as you can about someone before you get too seriously involved. This is where patience is the key. While the idea of a great relationship makes you excited, slow things down and really get to know them. Have flirty and more serious conversations, and go on several casual dates to make sure that this is what you want. Then go ahead and embrace the new relationship you’re building. Don’t push though; There’s always time to get to know each other better as time goes on.

Take It Slow

Once you know there’s a mutual interest between you two, there’s no reason not to take it slow. Relationships are a learning experience. Give yourself the best chance possible by allowing the relationship the time it needs to grow. Enjoy each other in whatever relationship you have and don’t worry so much about the future. Taking it slow will allow you to savor the excitement of discovering a new person. If you put in the effort, your relationship will end up where it needs to be. Don’t screw it up by pushing for more too early.

About the Author

Elizabeth Monsoor
Elizabeth Monsoor is currently working on her Bachelor of Fine Arts in dance at Cornish College of the Arts in Seattle, Washington. While Elizabeth pursues a career in dance, she has rediscovered her love for writing. When she is not in class or at rehearsals, Elizabeth enjoys actively commenting on episodes of reality television and tweeting her observations on relationships several times a day. She has an “eyes wide open” approach to dating, acting as an unofficial advisor and commentator on her friends’ relationships. Elizabeth hopes that her opinions on relationships and her love of sarcasm both entertain and inspire her readers.

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