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Dating Tips & Relationship Advice

Dating Advice For Women

December 5, 2013

Why You Don’t Get Called After a Great Date


Ever go out with someone and all of a sudden never hear from them again? You were probably thinking things were going well, but in the end this person just left you high and dry. Sucks doesn’t it? It’s happened to the best of us and for the singles out there it may happen to you a few more times over the course of your dating life. It may hurt your ego a bit, but it’s probably all for the best. If a person can’t just tell you flat out that they don’t think it’s going to work, then who needs them anyway?

If a person you just started dating pulls the disappearing act on you, try not to beat yourself over it. It may seem like a cop out and it gives you no closure whatsoever, but for some reason this is the path they chose to follow. Why would someone do this you ask? Let’s examine some of possible reasons why:

They just aren’t that into you.

You may have thought things were going great, but for some reason your new friend did not. Maybe they didn’t think your personalities meshed well or maybe they just weren’t that attracted to you. The vanishing act may be a way for this person to avoid hurting your feelings, even though they are likely doing that anyways by ignoring you. This person doesn’t want to come across as a jerk, so they simply vanish and hope everything ends smoothly.

They think you just aren’t that interested in them.

Some people like to play hard to get, but in the end it could hurt them. If someone doesn’t think you’re interested in them, they just may just give up on wooing you. You could be a little guarded or standoffish or maybe you sat through your dates with your phone glued to your fingers. All of those things could come across as red flags and make your date think you don’t care about the time you’re spending with them. Why waste time on a person who doesn’t want to spend any time on you?

They found someone else.

This is something we hate to hear about and it happens more than we’d like it to. You may never hear from someone again because they simply found a person who clicked better than you did. Everyone is looking for their Mr. or Mrs. Right and unfortunately you didn’t make the cut. Having to tell someone that may seem a bit harsh, so people choose to write off that person completely to avoid hurt feelings.

They are scared of commitment.

If it seemed like the two of you really clicked over the first few dates, your guy or girl may run away because they are afraid to commit. It could be that a past relationship has scarred them or that they simply don’t know how to deal with what could be something really great. They may be second guessing themselves and their ability to maintain a healthy relationship and in the end you pay for their relationship quirks.

It’s too much, too soon.

Ever see How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days? If someone pulls an Andie (Kate Hudson) and starts making a scrapbook of your future wedding and kids, it will absolutely overwhelm a person. You guys haven’t discussed a full-on relationship, yet these more serious topics are being discussed. Sure, you guys are having fun, but talking about a future together so soon may be a bit too much. If someone feels like everything is moving too fast, they may just run the other way and do it in the quietest way possible.

Have any thoughts on why someone would disappear after a few dates? Leave your comments below or start a conversation with us on our Facebook or Twitter pages.

About the Author

Elisa Freese
Elisa Freese is a lifelong New Yorker with a Bachelor’s degree from SUNY New Paltz and a Master’s degree from New York University. She has always had a love for writing and now that school and homework are finally done forever, Elisa is going back to writing on a regular basis. In addition to writing, Elisa loves anything that has to do with traveling, shopping, social media and TV/movies. With her experiences, as well as the experiences of her friends and family, Elisa hopes to shed some light on the ins and outs of dating to the readers of Nouveau Dating.

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