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October 3, 2013

Signs You Need A Dating Break

Romance ahead.

Do you often find yourself ending your relationships prematurely or feeling unable to maintain a romantic relationship? There are several reasons why you may be feeling rocky in romantic relationships, like:

  1. A recent break-up
  2. A lingering attachment to your ex
  3. A recent life transition (grief over a recent loss, parents’ divorce/re-marriage, loss of a job, unemployment, etc.)
  4. A mentally unhealthy state (depression, anxiety, ADHD, eating disorders)
  5. Being new to relationships

If you think you’re not ready (or you’re not sure if you’re ready) for a relationship for whatever reason, you might want to consider taking a relationship hiatus. You should take one not only for your well-being, but for the sanity of your potential mates as well.

Why a Hiatus is Beneficial to You

At one time or another, everyone needs a time out. This time typically comes when you’re brain is cluttered with life events that are new or difficult to process. You’re too busy processing your stressful life to put the proper mental and emotional effort into yourself, let alone a relationship. This means that currently, you’re probably not the happiest of campers. As you may have heard many times before, you need to be happy with yourself before you can be happy in a relationship. So use your dating time-out to be productive: Spend time with friends and family, see a therapist or a career counselor, explore your interests, joining clubs or activities….you get the point. Do whatever you need to feel good and secure about yourself and your life. Remember, there’s no set timeline. Take as long as you need to feel comfortable. It’ll be worth it in the end.

As for your Potential Partners…

They will be thanking you for:

  1. Not stringing them along, then dumping them because you weren’t ready
  2. Knowing what you want
  3. Your radiance (stemming from your genuine confidence)
  4. Your ability to pay proper attention to the relationship
  5. Giving the best version of yourself

So never fear if you’ve been struggling with relationship initiation or maintenance—your best romantic life lies straight ahead. As long as you take a necessary break, it will be a win-win for you and your future partner.


About the Author

Laura Baines
Coincidentally born on Valentine’s Day, Laura has a passion for playing cupid by helping others find love. She has a degree in psychology from CU-Boulder and aspires to earn her masters in counseling.

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