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December 12, 2012

The Dating Game

Portrait of a man hiding his face behind a question mark

How to Learn About That New Guy – Fast!

Sometimes it feels like the dating game can have even higher stakes than the Hunger Games. You’re looking to find love, but you’re also busy with work, friends, and life in general – you don’t have time to waste on multiple dates with the wrong guy. But how do you really get to know someone over one dinner or a couple of drinks?

You might think that you should just dive right in with the “big questions.” Asking him how many kids he wants while you wait for your entrées to arrive, however, is a surefire way to never get a second date. You’ve got to find out about him without frightening him away, so being completely direct is the wrong tactic. But what questions are the right questions?

The key is to ask questions that will tell you if your personalities are compatible, not that he’s also hoping for two girls and one boy. You’ll have time later to work out those specifics. Right now, think of questions that will help you find out if he is the right kind of person for you. For example, a friend of mine likes to ask his dates “Which is better, unicorn or Pegasus?”  Now, that may not sound like it has anything to do with, well, anything, but it really tells my friend a lot about the girl. Does she get thrown by the odd question, or does she have fun with it? Does she answer? Does she give a reason for her answer? This particular friend likes offbeat, nerdy people – the kind of people who would know which mythical creature they would prefer – so by gauging their reaction to this one simple question, he can figure out a lot about how compatible they are.

Your questions won’t be about magical horses, of course – they should be relevant to you. Think about the kind of people you like and the kind of person you’re looking for, and create questions that will reveal if they have those qualities. They can be funny or more serious, but steer away from anything too direct. The point is to make them part of natural, casual conversation – only you know that you’re really testing your date. By using carefully crafted questions like these, you can learn a lot about the new man across the table in a short amount of time, without turning the date into a job interview. The dating game should be fun, after all!

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About the Author

Ashley Clarke
Ashley Clarke is the Executive Editor at Nouveau Dating. Ashley loves writing on relationships, love and dating and is responsible for finding authors who are natural writers on these topics. Contact info@nouveaudating.com if you are interested.




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