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How To Kiss

February 28, 2013

Kissing Tips

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Written by: Tiffany Jones
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A first kiss should be approached like a dip in an unfamiliar lake. You don’t jump in head first and hope for the best. You sit on the shoreline, test the temperature, ease your way in, feet first, while still holding on to solid ground. To be successful and safe, you discover the depth slowly and with caution. Simply put, you take your time and build your confidence level. A first kiss is the key that either opens up or slams the door shut to further sexual exploration. Biology plays a role. Many men prefer wet, open mouthed kisses because male saliva contains testosterone and they subconsciously want to trigger female desire. In addition, being in close proximity allows us to judge compatibility and attraction based on pheromones. Ninety percent of human cultures participate in the act of kissing.  It is tried, tested and true.  The science of kissing (i.e. philematology) suggests that deep passionate kisses decrease the production of stress hormones and increase feel good brain chemicals.

Like a swim in the ocean, we need to feel it out. Pay attention to your partner’s responses. Kissing, how we do it, and what we like, varies from person to person, time to time. Open your perception. Give, take, and error on the side of soft and gentle to start. Kisses can build in intensity and should if your partner reciprocates. It is easy to progress in passion but difficult to pull back after shoving an unwanted tongue down an uninviting throat. This isn’t grade school so don’t kiss like your trying to get it done all in one swoop. Let lips take over and linger. Kissing, when done properly is like dancing. Work with your partner, take turns leading and following, and if you are looking for feedback, kiss around the neck and lightly kiss the ear lobes, but don’t blow and don’t bite, at least not at this point in the game. Kissing should leave you both wanting more. So flirt through a kiss and be receptive to your partner. People usually kiss in the manner they like to be kissed, so get out of yourself and into the lips of your lover.

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About the Author

Tiffany Jones
Tiffany Jones is the founder and CEO of Denver Sexology LLC. She is a registered psychotherapist and has been a sex and relationship coach for the last 11 years.

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